Trout Underground goes on holiday

Tom Chandler from The Trout Underground  on vacation was inside Westminster Abbey taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read ‘£10,000 per call’.

Tom, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.

The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for £10,000 you could talk to God.

Tom thanked the priest and went along his way.

Next stop was in Lincoln There, at the cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in London and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.

She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for £10,000 he could talk to God.

‘O.K., thank you,’ said Tom.

He then travelled to York , Durham and Liverpool

In every Cathedral he saw the same golden telephone with the same ‘£10,000 per call’ sign under it.

Tom, upon leaving the N of England decided to travel to Scotland to see if the Scots had the same phone.

He arrived in Glasgow, and again, as he entered the cathedral , there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read ’50 pence per call.’

Tom was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. ‘Reverend, I’ve travelled all over England and I’ve seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I’m told that it is a direct line to heaven, but in England the price was £10,000 per call. Why is it only 50pence here?’

The priest smiled and answered, ‘You’re in Scotland now, son …. it’s a local call.’


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  1. ChuckG · December 30, 2011

    Ahhhhh, so that’s why those golden phones in our churches in the States cost £50,000!

  2. JP2 · December 30, 2011

    hahahahahaha….all this week TC has been in Hawaii, touting it as paradise. Can’t be right all the time….Although,there are factors each way…Hawaii= 80 degreesF,sunshine,bikinis….Scotland= single malt,uh,haggis…..3 degreesC….trout and pike fishing….ummm….

  3. Jim Burns · December 30, 2011

    Ha Ha everybody knows Scotland is Gods country.
    God it’s rainlng.
    God it’s snowing.
    God it’s windy.
    God it’s sunny. Not that often.
    Oh but what I’d give to be at Diamond Head in Hawaii