Skip to content
Menu
The Urban Fly Fisher
  • About
  • Read my old stuff here!
  • Subscribe via email here
The Urban Fly Fisher

Scotsman Joke

27 November, 2004 by Alistair

The Englishman’s wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear.
“Good God, woman! Why aren’t you wearing any knickers?” her husband demanded.
“Well, you don’t give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.”
The Englishman immediately reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s £50. Go and buy yourself some underwear.”

Next, the Irishman’s wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she is wearing no undies.
“Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You’ve no knickers. Why not?”
She replies, “I can’t afford any on the money you give me.”
He reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s £20.
Go and buy yourself some underwear!”

Lastly, the Scotsman’s wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it.
“Sweet mudder of Jesus, Aggie! Where the frig are yer drawers?”
She too explains, “You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta affarrd any.”
The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and says, “Well, fer the love ‘o Jasus, ‘n the sake of decency, here’s a comb. Tidy yerself up a bit.”

Share this:

  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window) Tumblr
  • Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window) WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Related

2 thoughts on “Scotsman Joke”

  1. peter tegstad says:
    2 December, 2004 at 9:41 am

    very funny!!! i might have to bring that joke to the attention of one of my limey buddies in the states!

    Loading...
  2. davy says:
    29 April, 2008 at 10:53 am

    thats a cracker lol

    Loading...

Comments are closed.

Connect with The Urban Fly Fisher on the cursed Facebook

Connect with The Urban Fly Fisher on the cursed Facebook

  1. Alistair on JVice – one of my favourite things!21 November, 2024

    You will not get better for your money , looking back I received it in 2009 and it still works…

  2. Alistair on JVice – one of my favourite things!21 November, 2024

    I have used it for around 10 years ! Love it !

  3. espo74 on JVice – one of my favourite things!21 November, 2024

    A year or so later, do you still love the jvice? I am considering purchasing one...

  4. Alex Laurie on So it looks like I am a friend to the sheep.6 April, 2024

    You did well to get out fishing at all in this weather and to get a trout in those conditions.…

  5. Richard huntley on Winter memories – summer bites?10 December, 2023

    I had plenty of evenings fishing the water of leith plus the river Avon , Edinburgh area . Caught a…

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 1,966 other subscribers.

Please Donate to my Hosting Fees Fund

©2025 The Urban Fly Fisher | Powered by WordPress and Superb Themes!
%d